funny

The first thing i do when i wake up

The first thing i do when i wake up

The first thing i do when i wake up: Try to sleep again!

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Rules when i first wake up

Rules when i first wake up

Rules when i first wake up: 1. Everyone shut the hell up 2. Get out of my way 3. Don’t ask me any damn questions

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Every day

Every day

Every day at work i wonder if this is going to be the day i accidentally scream: “Shut the f*ck up” out loud instead of just in my head.

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Cleaning is

Cleaning is

Cleaning is just putting stuff in less obvious places.

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When i have

When i have

When i have children,
i’m gonna make them watch
the movie “2012” and tell
them i survived that.

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